I'm here!!

Okay everyone, no need to panic! Yes, I am single again. Don't worry though, it's definitely a VERY, VERY good thing! I'm very happy now! I feel like the sun is shining again and like the sadness I had been feeling for over a month now is gone. This just happened this past weekend, so the fact that I'm happy and I just ended things with TDH, shows that I REALLY wasn't happy with him at the end. I'm really sick of telling people over and over again about what happened, so maybe I will another time here, but for right now, I'm not going to because I don't feel like it, I'd rather not waste anymore of my time on him! I'd rather move on and be happy!

So, the deep unhappiness that I had been experiencing for the past month should explain my absence from my blog and I apologize, I guess I just needed to be alone with my thoughts and feelings. Anyways, just wanted to let you all know that I'm here and good and happy. I'm thinking about starting a brand new blog, for a fresh start, kind of like a karmic cleansing, so if/when I do, I will let you all know, just e-mail me and I'll let you know when I get a new address!

WOW!

I'm so giddy after watching the new 90210 that I don't know if I'll be able to sleep! WOW!! Wow wow wow wow wow!! Now they just need to bring Dylan back and I will be totally fulfilled. Not sure if I could handle it though, Dylan was my ultimate favorite. But, I would like to find out whether or not I could handle it! I'm sure everyone would be able to hear my screams of joy if they brought him back! Bring back Dylan McKay! YAY!

Insight from a Pro...

Well, things are going great with TDH and I'm seeing The Professional again! Yay! She's pretty much recovered from the nasty Staph infection and is seeing patients part-time, so as soon as I got the call with that news, I scheduled an appointment. It felt so good to talk to her again and be able to work through things with someone who is a "Professional" on issues and who knows pretty much everything about me and how my mind works and processes things. She said that it sounds like TDH is definitely dealing with a ton of stuff and that I do need to be patient with the situation, but also ask for what I need from him. She reminded me of my tendency when things aren't absolutely perfect to just completely freak out and think things are about to take a nosedive and start distancing myself. She told me I need to remind myself of how things have been going and that especially at a time like this, TDH wouldn't keep a relationship if he wasn't really interested in me and he did tell me outright that he's definitely not stringing me along. She said that he sounds like a truly nice guy who thinks things through and that he sounds like he's really trying, so just be patient.

Otherwise, things are going well with TDH and I. He is definitely making an effort to spend more time with me and show me that he misses spending more time with me and I really appreciate it.

Tomorrow is my birthday. Should be interesting, just the whole another year older thing. Going out to dinner with a bunch of people, including TDH, Crazy Girl, Blondie and Gay (Former) Neighbors. Should be fun. I think TDH and I are going to celebrate my birthday alone on Saturday evening.

Anyways, I promise to be better about writing more, it's just been a crazy past couple of weeks, lots of hot swimmers I had to watch swim and lots of work stuff I had to do!

Help! (With a new little note)

So, I've been doing really well so far without The Professional for the past few months, but now I feel like I could use her advice. TDH has been really busy lately with helping his brother finish his basement (he's buying his brother's house), work, booking shows so he can start playing music again, trying to get a band together, hanging out with friends and hanging out with me. All of this while living 45 minutes outside of town with his parents until he takes over his brother's house which won't be until the end of October (it was originally supposed to be the beginning of October.) I'm trying to not let the fact that we don't get to see each other as much as we used to get to me, but it is and I can't help it. We still see each other twice a week, but I guess I just got used to seeing him more often. When we're together, I don't feel insecure at all, but when it's Wednesday and I haven't seen him since Sunday, the "crazy" comes out and I start feeling insecure thinking that maybe he just doesn't care if he sees me as much or maybe he should be making more of an effort to spend time with me. Then I just wonder if I need to calm down because TDH is going crazy and not getting much sleep trying to balance everything in his life, so me bitching about not seeing him isn't going to help him. BUT, I don't think some reassurance from him would be asking too much, am I wrong? How do I go about asking for reassurance though? This has always been something that's been hard for me to do. This is definitely stressing me out. Ugh.

A little side note: I wish I could get back in to see The Professional, but unfortunately, she has been out sick with a Staph infection. I could see someone else, but that would mean starting over from square one with someone new, so I'm not sure if that's something I should do.

Planning

I know. I know I have been an awful blogger. All I can say is that I've been busy and after not writing for so long, the thought of trying to update everyone on everything feels so overwhelming!

So, I'm not going to do that, I'm just going to say that everything is still going very well in my life. TDH is still pretty fantastic. He's going through a little rough patch in his life right now and hopefully I'm being good at supporting him through it. He's going through that time in his life that I think we all go through at one point, where you feel like you are two people stuck in one body. Part of him wants to be the "rockstar" that he's always wanted to be and be out traveling the world, playing his music, meeting people from all walks of life. The other part of him wants to settle down, and in his words, "continue building a burgeoning relationship with a woman such as yourself," and start a family. I told him that how he's feeling is totally normal and that when it comes down to it, he just needs to find a way to meld the two together. He said he's scared he'll never be able to be completely happy. I reassured him again that it's totally normal to feel that way and that maybe a change of perspective is in order. Instead of focusing on all of the bad things in the world, he needs to focus on all of the good things and all of the good things he's been lucky enough to experience, all of the amazing places he's traveled and all of the experiences he's been able to share with his family. I used to be like TDH a lot, when it comes to his ambivalence about the world. I think that all changed when I had the brain tumor scare 2 years ago and realized that life is too short and I might as well focus on the good and make sure that I'm surrounded by things that make me happy. After we talked about all of this for a while, he said he had been scared to open up to me about all of this because I had told him about past relationships where the guy was totally insecure, so he didn't want to turn me away from him. I laughed and told him there was absolutely no need to worry and that if I thought he was anything like that guy, I would have been long gone! Also, I told him that I'm always here for him if he ever wants to talk.

TDH wants to plan a long weekend getaway to the beach with me, so that should be a lot of fun. We're working on that now and should hopefully have that planned within the next couple of days. I could definitely use a little vacation and a long weekend with just TDH would be awesome!!

This weekend was good - TDH and I went out for drinks on Friday night, Saturday evening, TDH took me to a work associate's house for a barbecue. Today, I hung out with Crazy Girl. She's going through a rough time herself - she's scared she's going to lose her job, so that's adding to her already usually high anxiety level. What sucks is that she doesn't deserve to lose her job, she hasn't done anything wrong, her boss (a woman) thinks she's "just too tall and too blonde" so she doesn't like her. It's totally ridiculous. So Crazy Girl is reporting this to HR along with a bunch of other totally inappropriate comments her boss has made in front of other people, including a comment that insinuates that Crazy Girl and I are in a lesbian relationship together. So Crazy Girl and I went out shopping for a new business suit for her and then out for burgers. Yum!

I'm still loving taking ballet again, it's so much fun and I get a great workout from it. Better than going to the gym!! Haven't been back to tap class yet, but I probably will this week, I didn't want to hurt the toe now that it's all healed up.

Anyways, that's all for me now! I'll try to be better about updating!

Hello!

Well, once again, I've been an absent blogger, so I'll apologize for my absence! I hope everyone had a splendid 4th of July weekend. Mine was quite relaxing. I had Thursday and Friday off from work, so it was quite the long weekend for me! Wednesday afternoon, TDH came over when he was done with work (I think he likes seeing me in my "business" clothes!) and we hung out until dinnertime and walked up the street to have dinner. Thursday I lounged around all day and night, nothing too exciting.

Friday, I went to Crazy Girl's house and we hung out with her neighbor, barbecued and hung out in the sun. Friday evening, TDH came over, I baked cookies (yes, from scratch, let me know if you want the recipe!), we looked at houses for sale online, watched the city's fireworks from outside my building and then walked up the street to get drinks. Then we came home and watched a movie while he gave me a massage. Saturday morning/afternoon, TDH cooked me breakfast - blueberry pancakes and bacon, before he left to check out some neighborhoods he might be interested in living in. Saturday evening, TDH came over again and we went to watch a cover band play for a little bit, but the place was empty, so we only stayed for about a half hour before leaving and coming back to my place to go to sleep early so he could get an early start on Sunday morning. Sunday, I did absolutely nothing!!

Things with TDH are still going so well, he's just fantastic! I can't help the gushing! We were talking on the phone last night and he told me how he e-mailed me an article about the space station because he was reading it and thought how I would love to read it too. So I said to him, "Awhh, you think about me!" He said, "Of course I do! I think about you all the time!" Sigh... He called early this morning and asked me to lunch, I love it when he does that! He's helping a friend move tomorrow night, so we have plans to spend Saturday together. I love how things with him aren't just surface all the time - he likes talking about more deep things sometimes to really try to get to know me. I feel safe with him and I haven't been so scared to open up to him and let myself be vulnerable. It's definitely weird, but really nice to trust someone like this and feel safe. Yes, there's always a chance of getting hurt, but you never know how happy you could be if you don't take that chance.

Chocolate chip cookies, puppy dogs and rainbows...

I know it's been over a week since I last posted, but I've been busy reuniting with TDH! He was exhausted when he got back on Saturday, so he came over on Sunday and we spent all evening and night Sunday together until he had to go into work on Monday morning. I told him how happy I was that he is back, over and over again and he said he was too. Once, I was like, "YAY!" He responded with, "What?" I said, "I'm just really happy you're back!" He said, "I missed you too!" I guess it was pretty obvious that that was what I was meaning to say, but just couldn't get out. I guess some old habits die hard!

Tuesday evening, TDH came over after having drinks with his old roommate, he was a bit drunk, but he was wanting to have some fun in bed. Why is it that guys seem to forget that being drunk usually means having some troubles when it comes to sex? It doesn't bother me, but it only leads to them feeling embarrassed. The next morning, we woke up and TDH wanted us to cook a big breakfast - blueberry pancakes, bacon, english muffins, etc. So, we started cooking and when breakfast was ready, the beers from the night before caught up with him and he didn't feel well. I told him not to worry, that I didn't want him to eat just because I cooked. So I finished eating and we got back into bed and watched Back to the Future Part 3, while TDH recovered from his night of fun. It's so nice that we're both in sales and can go into work whenever we want! He left at around 1pm and I went off to work.

Wednesday night I went out with Bra Girl and Nik to watch some bands play. Friday evening, Blondie and I went out to dinner together for some delicious food. TDH was out of town for the night with some of his high school friends.

Yesterday afternoon, TDH came over to hang out and spend the evening with me. It was cute because we both didn't care what we did, it was just both of our priorities to be with each other. Initially, we were going to go see a friend's band play, but TDH was tired from the night before, so he kind of just wanted to veg out, but if I wanted to go out, he would take one for the team. I told him that I didn't care what we did, I just wanted to spend time with him, that was my priority for the night. He teased me for saying that. I was like, "I say something sweet and you make fun of me?!" (He knows it's hard for me to be vulnerable.) So we watched "Teen Wolf," had some fun in bed and then went out to dinner.

After we got back from dinner, we sat on the couch and were talking about random stuff. He was telling me about how his mom and dad ask about me every day. I told him I think that's cute. After talking more about random stuff, he told me that his mom likes/liked (can't remember which he said) his ex-girlfriend. Ugh. Why do guys say stuff like that?! I really didn't need to hear that. I didn't know how to respond to that, so I was like, "Okay." We talked about more random stuff, some serious stuff and other random stuff and then decided to go back into the bedroom and watch some tv.

Funny story: We were watching the end of "Dirty Dancing," where Johnny and Baby do their big dance. So I told TDH about how my best friend from high school is getting married next year and she wanted to do Johnny and Baby's final dance with her fiance for their first dance at their wedding. TDH thought this was an awesome idea. My best friend's fiance did not. So, as we were watching the final dance, at the part where Baby and Johnny are dancing amongst the hotel guests, and Johnny lifts Baby above his head, not "The Lift," just where he's standing and she's standing and he lifts her, TDH says, "I bet we could do that!" I just laughed, thinking he wasn't serious. He was. He jumps out of bed, in his underwear, and says, "Come on! Let's try it!" So I get out of bed, in my bra and underwear, laughing hysterically at this point. TDH says, "Don't make fun of me if I can't do it. Johnny was really strong, he's lifting her from a dead stand. But you're like, what, 100 pounds? I think I can do it!" So, yeah, 6'4" TDH and little 5'4" me totally did this at 1am in our underwear. It was freaking hilarious! But we did it! TDH lifted me! Twice! So funny!

Anyways, after that, we had what we both now consider to be the best sex either of us have ever had. Absolutely mind-blowing. Then it was sleepy-time.

This morning we woke up and stayed in bed, just lounging around for a while, talking. At one point in our discussions from the night before, TDH had said that he doesn't know me, so I questioned him about this. He said, "I would hope that I don't fully know you yet. There's still more after the chocolate chip cookies, puppy dogs and rainbows stage." I laughed and said that of course there's more, but that I think we're past the "honeymoon" period of the relationship. At that point of the relationship, both people are still on their best behavior and I think we're past that at this point. He agreed, but he just wondered if we've fully seen each others flaws. I told him that he knows my flaws and that's my difficulty with being vulnerable, but that I'm obviously getting much better with that and then I gave him examples. I asked him what his flaws are and he asked me what I thought they are. I told him that I would think that it's that he tries to do everything and can maybe sometimes spread himself too thin. He agreed, but said that it's just because he wants to experience life. He said that he's been told in the past that he doesn't communicate well/clearly, but he thinks he does and he thinks it's more that those people didn't communicate well, not him.

At one point, I said something that came off totally wrong and I feel badly about. I asked what he's like in a fight - if he is an avoider and just tries to end the fight quickly even if it doesn't really get resolved, just so that the fighting can be avoided. Or if he is a total dick and really fights and insists that he's right, no matter what. I figured he would be one of the two, just because that's been typical of the guys I've dated in the past, and that was totally wrong of me to do. So TDH said, "So you've already prejudged me, huh?" I said, "I'm just guessing!" He said, "You think I'm a total dick, huh?" Then I felt awful. That is totally not how I meant it and I obviously do not think TDH is a dick, otherwise I wouldn't be with him. That's what I said to him and I apologized profusely. He laughed and said he was just joking and said there was no need to apologize, but I already felt so bad for saying what I said.

We had a nice day just laying around and finally around 4pm, it was time to get our lazy butts out of bed and time for TDH to go home.

Anyways, should be an easy work week for both TDH and I, we both have 3 day work weeks with the holiday weekend ahead. I don't have anything special planned for the long weekend though, so with Bra Girl, Blondie and most of my other friends out of town, I'm not sure what I'll be up to this weekend. I think TDH might be house-hunting this week and he wants my help, so that should be fun. He's also mentioned possibly planning and going on a Caribbean vacation together sometime in the fall too!

V. Excited!

Well, TDH has called a bunch more times since he first called a few days ago. When he called me on Thursday evening, I got some very good news! I was wrong in thinking he was coming home on Sunday, he gets back today (Saturday)!! YAY!

He called again last night and we talked for a bit, and he told me that as long as he isn't extremely tired, he wants to come to my place once he gets in. So YAY! I guess he definitely missed me! Anyways, I have a busy day today, but I'm definitely looking forward to TDH's return this evening!

Sigh...

TDH is still totally making me swoon and we've been dating since March. He called me today from Asia. I'll say it again. He called me from Asia. Where he's been on a trip with his family for a week and a half. He called me! It wasn't enough to just e-mail me once or twice a day, he called me! Yay! I can't wait until he gets back on Sunday! We talked for about 20 minutes about his trip and what I've been up to. Sigh. I really like him! I don't think I'll be able to restrain myself from jumping on him and hugging him for a long, long time when I first see him again!

Besides TDH, not too much going on. Had Steadman with me yesterday and Monday, glad that's over with, it's just exhausting. Think I need to call my neurologist tomorrow, I don't know if it's the heat, but I've gotten 3 or 4 migraines in the past week, up from 1 every other month. I think I need to up my preventative medication. Oh well.

The toe is healing well, I should be able to dance next week. I'm walking normally now, no more limping so that's definitely a good sign! I'm going to take a stretching class tomorrow evening so I can feel like less of a lazy ass, sitting around watching cooking shows and crappy tv.

Anyways, can't wait for Sunday and TDH's return!

Sweating

Well, I'm finally done feeling sorry for myself and my toe! I've been over it for a few days now, but I've just been busy being out and about. Had a follow up appointment today with my podiatrist and he said things are healing well and if they continue to heal well, I should be able to go back to dancing in a week or so. Yay!

Otherwise, I'm just tired. had Steadman, my boss, working with me today, so that's always tiring, not to mention the fact that it's in the 90s here. He's with me again tomorrow, but at least it's only one more day to get through.

Blondie and I went out to dinner together on Saturday night and then went to see Partyboy and his band play a little gig. Blondie thinks he's cute, so I'm trying to set the two of them up for a brief hook-up before he goes away to med school. Sunday, I hung out with Bra Girl by the pool until we couldn't stand the hot weather anymore.

Still e-mailing everyday with TDH. He sends me pictures too, it's really cute. I miss him so much, I just can't wait until he gets back on Sunday. Not sure if I'll get to see him on Sunday or not, but at least I'll get to hear his voice and talk again. Sigh. I just can't wait to be with him again! I'm such a dork.

Oh, I finished reading one of Chelsea Handler's books today, "My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands." It was absolutely hilarious! I highly recommend it if you're looking for a light, entertaining and quick read.

A Rant

Okay, I'm not one to really complain much, but I need to just take a few minutes to get some complaining out because I'm feeling sorry for myself...

Had my toe surgery on Tuesday which went well. Took a sick day from work yesterday so that I could be off my foot since I'm usually on my feet all day when working. I was beyond bored. I don't mind being home all day when it's by choice, but when I'm forced to be home all day, it's unbearable, know what I mean? Last night I had to do the first bandage change on my toe. That was gross. Usually for something like that in the past, I've had my Mom there to look first and tell me if it looks bad or not and just take care of it for me. This time though, I was all alone and I hated that. No one there to look at the wound first to reassure me or just hold my hand. Even though it wasn't totally horrible, just a bit gross, I still hated doing it and it made me want to cry for some reason.

My toe still hurts when I try to put weight on it when I walk on it and I definitely can't wear shoes with a heel, only flip-flops. If you knew me in real life, you'd know that I live in 4 inch heels, so only being able to wear flip-flops is torture. I get frustrated when I try to walk normally and it hurts, it just makes me want to cry. It's not the pain that makes me want to cry, but the frustration of being injured. I also really hate that I can't take dance classes for a week or two, it makes me feel really lazy. I love dancing, so this not being able to dance right now business really sucks.

Anyways, I hate ranting like this, but I just felt like I needed to get it out instead of just sitting here on my couch, feeling sorry for myself and wishing I were getting ready to go take some dance classes. And I know things could be WAY worse, I just hate feeling like I can't do things, it REALLY frustrates me. Grr...

Cue cheesy grin...

Well, once again my stressing out was for nothing, even though I only stressed out for a brief hour or two. I e-mailed TDH on Sunday morning a quick e-mail to say that I hope his flight to Asia wasn't too bad and just telling him about my day on Saturday and my plans for Sunday. When I got back from Crazy Girl's house later that evening, I already had a reply back from TDH! We've been writing back and forth since then, he's been telling me all about what he and his family are doing in Asia and asking about what I'm up to. He even asked if I want him to bring me back anything from the markets over there. Sigh... I told my Mom about TDH writing me and she said, "Wow, he's got the hots for you!" She's so funny. He just makes me squeal and grin like a crazy lady. In a good way, obviously!

So, that's the little update on TDH.

Tomorrow after working in the morning, I'm having some minor surgery on one of my toes. Since I used to dance so much growing up and I'm hereditarily (not a real word, I know!) prone to them, I tend to get ingrown nails on my right big toe. Not a very comfortable thing. So tomorrow, my podiatrist will use a laser to hopefully correct this problem. Won't be fun, but it will be better to do this then have to go into his office every 6 weeks to have him clip the nail a certain way so it doesn't grow into the skin. Gross, I know.

Anyways, I have a couple of books to read during what should be my brief recovery. One I've already started on - "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly." So far it's really good. I also have that new show on the Discovery channel saved in my DVR to watch - "When We Left Earth," about the early space missions. I should have plenty of stuff to occupy my time!

What to Say?

Best College Friend's wedding was beautiful. Quite an exhausting weekend, but she looked beautiful and had a fantastic time. I got back Monday afternoon and even though I was beyond tired, I managed to go to work and take a dance class. TDH and I talked on the phone Monday night for a while.

Tuesday, TDH came over, we went for a nice walk and grabbed a drink at a lounge up the street. We came back to my place and talked for a while about random stuff - we always have the best conversations. We finally decided to go to sleep, but not until we had some mind-blowing sex. Seriously, I had to just lay there after for a good 10 minutes before I could get up or go to sleep. I don't know what it is, but we have the best sex ever. And it's not just the best sex ever for me, TDH has told me on numerous occasions that it's the best sex ever for him and that he has never enjoyed sex so much or wanted it so much. It's crazy, but obviously in a good way!

Wednesday morning, TDH left for work and I worked from home for a bit before heading out to work a bit. TDH called and asked if I wanted to have lunch together. After seeing a pain in the ass office, I met up with TDH for lunch. He's so cute - at one point, he asked if I was wearing my usual "work ensemble." I told him yes, why? He replied, "You just look hot! That would be so distracting for your customers! But I like!" When I was driving to another office after lunch, TDH called and thanked me for meeting him for lunch and we chatted for a while until I had to go into an office. We talked again that night for almost two hours. It's strange, I'm not usually a big phone-talker, but we can just talk and talk.

Thursday evening, TDH came over after my dance class and we went to the lounge up the street for a drink and some dancing. We came back to my place and hung out some before some more fun in bed and then sleep. I had to get up earlier on Friday morning, so I couldn't be up too late.

Friday evening, TDH came over for a mini "Back to the Future" marathon. It's one of my favorite movies and he loves it too, so we watched the first two of the trilogy. We watched the movies and talked about random stuff like music and college and passions. He was going to stay up all night since he left this morning on his family trip to Asia, but he knew it wasn't going to be possible, so we slept from 1:30am until he had to go to back to his parent's house at 5:15am.

So, that's the latest! Is it too soon for me to miss TDH? I'm so used to talking to him so much during the day, so it feels weird that it's now 9:30pm and I haven't spoken to him all day. He won't be able to call while he's away, but he should be able to check his e-mail, so we have each other's e-mail addresses. Now since I have nothing better to do, I'll start stressing over when I should e-mail him. When is it too soon to e-mail him? I need to not freak out because I know he'll be happy to see an e-mail from me whenever he gets a chance to check his e-mail. He'll be in Asia for 2 weeks. Feels like forever, but hopefully it will go by quickly. You'd think this would be easy for me since I used to be in a cross-country relationship!!

Anyways, I'm going out with Bra Girl and a bunch of girls tonight. Went out with Blondie today and saw "Sex and the City" and then went to a street festival. Will probably go hang out with Crazy Girl tomorrow. Trying to stay busy!!

Busy weekend...

Off to Best College Friend's wedding this weekend to perform my Maid of Honor duties! Should be a crazy weekend!

Stayed at TDH's place last night. Cooked dinner for him on Wednesday night and he loved it! More to come after the weekend!

Squeeeeeee!

I must sound like a little piglet with all the squealing I've been doing today!

First, I text messaged TDH around 2:45pm, just to say, "Hope you're having a great day!" His reply: "I am now" That was it, I lost it and the squealing started.

Then he just called during a break from a meeting at work to chat and see what I was up to. We talked for a few minutes until his meeting started again and asked when my dance class is over tonight and said to give him a call after that and once I'm all settled in after. Sigh...

The squealing won't stop! I keep remembering things he said to me over the weekend and the past couple of weeks - I'm the best sex he's ever had, I'm gorgeous, he loves spending time with me, I make him smile, we have great conversations, he loves my laugh, I'm "G-d damn hot," etc. I'm sure I blush every single time I remember him saying these things, just as I did when he first said them to me.

A long one!

Where to begin?! Since I haven't updated in a while, I don't even know where to start.

My little trip to Europe was great - lots of food, visiting relatives and running around. It just went by way too quickly. TDH came over the night I got back and we just ordered takeout and cuddled on the couch together. He told me how he thought about me so much while I was gone and he was happy I'm back. I went out for a beer with him and his roommate the next night and then went back to his place to play old school Nintendo. He was being really sweet, putting his arm around me and kissing me on the forehead. After his roommate went to bed, we were just sitting on the couch talking and he was like, "I really like you. I love spending time with you, I always have so much fun. I just hope you know that I really, really like you." Then a little later he was like, "I just hope you're not seeing other guys or anything." I told him that I thought we already had this conversation and of course I wasn't seeing any other guys and that I had no interest in other guys, only him. I didn't go home until 4am and then had my manager working with me the next day which really sucked, but I managed to get through it and actually have a pretty good day. TDH text messaged me in the middle of the day that he hoped my day was going well. We talked on the phone for a while later that night before going to sleep.

The next night, TDH, Bra Girl, a new friend of mine I'll call Blondie and I all went out and met up with Nik and a guy she was out on a date with. We had a ton of fun people-watching at one bar and then dancing at another bar. TDH came home with me and we woke up the next morning, laid in bed all morning talking until noon and then got up and walked up the street and got brunch. It was so nice just walking together in the gorgeous weather having great conversation.

One of the great things about TDH is that he isn't scared to have more serious conversations and most of the time, is the one initiating them. When we were laying in bed together, he'd ask questions like, "What do you want from a relationship long-term?" Most guys run from questions like that, but he asks questions like that.

Before leaving my place after brunch, TDH invited me over to his place to watch a movie later on that night. Once he left, I went to Bra Girl's to hang out by the pool for the afternoon (armed with my SPF 45!). Later that night, I went to TDH's place but I was exhausted from not much sleep, I was struggling to stay awake during the movie. We were laying in bed talking after the movie and I kept dozing off, so we finally went to sleep. TDH was going to breakfast at his parent's house, so we were up at a decent time.

TDH asked me out to lunch on Monday, which was really nice. We met up at this great Mexican place I had never been to and had a nice long lunch together with great conversation. He called later on and asked me over again that evening to hang out, but I had too much work stuff to do, so I had to pass. Wednesday night, we ended up talking on the phone for over 3 hours, one of us should have just gone to the other's place, but oh well! Thursday evening I went to TDH's to hang out with him, his roommate, and one of his roommate's friends. We played some old school Nintendo and had a beer, good times. They all left and TDH and I had fun together.

Friday night I went out for dinner and drinks with Blondie. We both had a bit too much to drink and had to stay at the restaurant to guzzle water until we were okay to drive, but we had so much fun and great conversation. Saturday night, TDH and I grabbed some drinks at a bar and then went to a fun underground club for some dancing before coming back to my place for the night. Last night, TDH invited me over to his place to watch some 90210 and relax. We spent all day today together, just relaxing, talking and hanging out. Also had the best sex ever this morning, it was amazing. He told me again that he really likes me and that he thinks we have a lot in common, we truly enjoy spending time together and being with each other. So, we'll see how this goes!!

TDH is moving out of his apartment and is buying a house, which is awesome. Until he moves into his house in a couple of months, he'll be staying at his parent's house, which sucks, but it's smart. He goes to Asia for two weeks with his family on June 6, so exciting and an amazing trip.

I just really like TDH - he's smart in so many ways, funny, talented, confident, mature, sexy, and so many other things. I'm doing my best to be open and let myself be a bit more vulnerable than I normally would be so that our relationship can evolve. I've told TDH that it's hard for me to open up and let myself be vulnerable, but that I'm trying. He understands and told me that he thinks it's important in a relationship to open up, but he wants me to be comfortable and take my time.

So, that's the main update! As I think of more details, I'll post again! Hope you all had a great long weekend!!

Little update:

I left TDH's at 5:30pm today and TDH already called me again at 8pm just to chat while he was on his way back to his place from his parent's house after dinner. He's so freaking sweet! Also, don't you love it when guys do little things like look over at you and just reach over and brush the hair away from your eyes? Gives me butterflies! Sigh...

Soon!

Sorry for my long absence! Things have been crazy since I've been back from vacation, but I promise an update this weekend!

Vacation!!

Just a quick little update before I'm on vacation for a week!

This week flew by - just been working, taking dance classes and getting everything ready to go on my trip! Still talking to TDH every day - he's been crazy with trying to get his album finished, but luckily that will be done within the next week and then it's off to get copies made to be released!

I went out to the movies with some friends on Friday night and saw "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," absolutely hilarious!! After, we went to a wine bar for some dinner and wine. TDH text messaged me while I was in the movie, so I called him after and we made plans to meet up once I was done with dinner. TDH came over and we watched some 90210 and then had some fun in bed, always good times!

Saturday I didn't do anything too exciting, my day got off to a late start since I didn't wake up until 12:30pm since TDH and I didn't get to bed until 4:30am. So I just ran a bunch of errands, got my hair trimmed and then grabbed some dinner.

Today I took an abs class at the dance studio I take classes at which was ridiculously intense, but fantastic! Then just more errand running and finally packing!

So here's something interesting- Friday afternoon I got a phone call from good old Partyboy. He had been out of town for the past few weeks and had just gotten back and called to see what I was up to. We chatted for a bit and that was all. Later on in the night, around 2am, I got a text message from him, but I just ignored it. And then again on Saturday night, he called, but I ignored it. So, how to inform Partyboy that we can still hang out, but only as friends because I am in a relationship? It's just not appropriate for him to be calling me and text messaging me so late at night - I wouldn't be cool with some girl doing that to TDH. Bra Girl thinks that next time he calls during the day, I should just tell him that we can hang out, but just as friends because I'm seeing someone.

Anyways, hopefully TDH will be stopping by tomorrow before I leave to hang out for a bit, but we'll see. I'll be going to Europe for a week to visit family, so I'm so excited! I just can't believe it's here already, my Mom and I have been talking about this for so long. It's not like we've never been, we used to go every year, sometimes twice a year, but it's just been a rough year for my Mom, and we need some good Mother-Daughter bonding time, so we're both really excited.

Anyways, hope you all have a fantastic week, I'll be back on May 13th!

3 R's - Reassurance, Readiness and Relationships

Well, where to begin? So, after hearing about TDH's father having a heart attack, I was scared, irrationally, but I was. It was all for nothing though! TDH called Tuesday night saying he had been thinking about me and had been debating driving past his place and driving to mine earlier in the night. I told him he should have, but by that point, it was too late. We chatted for a while and I felt reassured that all was well. He even brought up what had happened on Friday with the whole being ready to have sex thing. I told him that I wanted to make sure that he was ready and that he was thinking with the brain in his head and not the brain in his penis. He said that he tends to over-think things and he thought about it a lot and he's sure that he's ready.

We were tentatively going to hang out on Wednesday night, but I was struck with a migraine, so unfortunately I was totally out of it. Told TDH this and he felt awful and asked if there was anything he could do. I told him there really wasn't anything he could do and that I just needed to wait for my medicine to work and sleep it off. We spoke again on Thursday and he told me to call him after my dance class to see if I'd be up for hanging out. He text messaged me before I got to call him and asked if I'd be up for 80s night at a club up the street. Why not? He called me and told me he had already had a couple of drinks and that he'd meet me there, a friend of his was going to drop him off.

When I got to the club TDH was definitely drunk, but it was hilarious and a good drunk. He was definitely "Sir Loves-A-Lot," as he told me he gets, he couldn't keep his hands off me. He grabbed me as soon as he saw me and gave me quite the kiss. He really couldn't keep his hands off me the whole hour we were there. We danced too and TDH kept doing the African Anteater Ritual from "Can't Buy Me Love," it might be one of the funniest things I've seen in a LONG time. After about an hour, we left and went back to my place. TDH picked me up and carried me into my bedroom and into bed. We started going at it. And yes, as you all already know, we had sex. TDH is definitely fantastic and really knows how to please me!

Here's the thing though. And I don't want you all to take this the wrong way and if you do, whatever. I'm definitely not a conceited person. I don't think I am supermodel hot. But TDH does. This is a bad thing in the sense that it makes TDH a bit insecure because he feels like he isn't good-looking enough for me even though I have told him that I think he's hot and sexy. He has told me on numerous occasions that I am the hottest, sexiest and most beautiful girl he's ever been with or seen. Then on Thursday and Friday, he asked me a few times if I find him attractive. I'm like, "Yes! Of course I do! I think you're extremely good-looking and incredibly sexy." Anyways, hopefully some more reassurance from me will help make him feel better, otherwise there really isn't anything I can do for him.

After some more fun on Friday morning, we showered, I got ready for work, and then drove TDH home. I think he really liked seeing me in my business clothes, he couldn't stop grabbing at me. Friday night, I went out with MJ and some friends, but I was exhausted and not really into it.

Saturday night, I went out with Bra Girl and her friend Nik to see some bands play. The two of them had been out drinking since 4pm, so by the time I met up with them at 10pm, they were wasted, but hilarious. We went to watch the bands and had so much fun. I had hung out with Nik before, but this time I got to know her and we have so much in common, so I think we're all going to hang out a lot more. After the bands finished at around 12:15am, we went to another bar and met up with TDH and a couple of his friends from high school. Nik ran into some old friends of hers so we all just sat at a big booth chatting and telling stories. We were having so much fun that we didn't realize that we were the only ones left in the bar and we had closed the place down. So we all left and said goodnight. Unfortunately, TDH was the DD for his friends, so there was to be no hanging out together after, plus he had to be up early for a long day working on the album, he's supposed to have it finished by Tuesday.

Sunday was a girl's day for me - Bra Girl, Nik and I met up for brunch and then went and got manicures and pedicures together. After, I just came home and relaxed.

So, that's the big update. I have some interesting stuff to post about my session with The Professional from this past Friday, but more on that another day!

Woo!

So I'm going on only a couple hours of sleep and trying to stay awake until 4pm when I can take a nap. Yes, I was up all night because of TDH. We didn't go to sleep until around 5am and then we were up again at around 8:30am. Did we have sex? Yep! Many times. So, I guess that means we are now officially in a "relationship." It feels so funny declaring it like that, but it's true, Single Girl is not single anymore! I shall elaborate more on the night later, but that's all for now, I have to keep myself moving or else I will fall asleep and I have an appointment with The Professional at 2pm and I don't want to miss it!